War

Why do I care so much?

I ask myself this question almost every day whenever I look in the mirror.

And this big-eyed, little girl stares back relentlessly, shrugging her shoulders indignantly. Her bitter lips loosen.

"I don't know."

Judged.

Handcuffed.

Blocked in.


Choking...

Suffocating....

Sorrow and Affliction slide inside my veins; pricking and attaching themselves to my heart.

Strangling me.

I, their prisoner.

Whenever Joy sneaks by, I beg her to make love to my heart, unfolding her nectarous sweetness, releasing my broken spirit.

So that I may forget Fear piercing through my flesh.

Scathingly, it chases me into the crooked corners of my deepest and darkest secrets.

Forcing me to shut out the world.

Somehow my heart's quiescent voice rings upon the ears of Jesus.

And He comes to find me, pulling me to shore from bondage.

My heart shivers from bleeding, yet He covers me in His blood.

He breathes unto me, bringing me closer to my destiny.

Every once in awhile, I fall inside the gaps of my wretchedness.
Yet, Jesus comes to save me again.
And again.

And again.


And again.

Because YOU won't rescue me.

"But I love you," You confess.

YOU may. But this battlefield is only big enough for my Savior and I.