Trapped.

“Baby, you deserve to not live in fear.”

My fiance told me this last night.

I don't deserve to, huh? I don't. But I secretly live with Fear.

Since college, Fear has paralyzed my soul, trapping my mind in a pool of uneasiness.

Overpowered with trepidation, I typically find myself trying to please others, not living my life to the fullest. After praying last night, God instructed me to read the Book of 2 Corinthians for the month of May. While confessing my fears to Him, He comforted my soul with His words. The first few verses reminded me that God will deliver me from the many perils of Life. God did it before. And He will do it again.

God always graciously answers our prayers and if we pay attention, we will realize that God is embedded in all angles of our daily lives. This is why we must die daily and stopped relying on ourselves. I learned today that the only difference between today and tomorrow is our Faith.

But the more my Faith grows, the closer Fear haunts me, squeezing and tightening its grip around my life. It just won't let go. Why? God only knows why. Whatever the reason is, I find myself running to God more often than ever, shivering like a lost child. Of course, I am still searching for my strength in God so that I will rise victoriously.

"Pray hard. Live easy", they say.

I just wish it was that simple.