Check Mate!

It made my soul vomit.

Just like the snow is melting away, so is my misery. I am so sick and tired of crying over him. It is terrible on how men can break a girl heart, but at the same time, a lot of guys do not do it on purpose. It just happens. They don't realize that their actions spruces up negative consequences, which in most cases, where the young lady suffers. But believe it or not, I know that guys suffer too. They know what they did. They just never say sorry.

It's kinda like playing Chess. ...And guys' actions scream CHECK MATE... which is usually out of surprise and you are the one stuck and hurt. Left feeling stupid.

How can someone get over their ex-lover? LOVE YOURSELF. Now, you probably thinking, oh no, now that is stupid. In order for someone to get over someone is to love another person again, NO. You must love YOURSELF first. Your heart is broken. Hell, mine was shredded into pieces. It hurt. It burned. It stung. It bled. It stunk. I actually walked around with the feelings of emptiness and brokenness. But guess what. I started to LOVE myself and things started to turn around slowly. But surely!

I was recently hired. I started Grad school. I am getting closer to my friends. MY TRUE FRIENDS. I started to find TAMARA again. Sometimes, when we are in relationships, NOT IN LOVE, (((notice, I wrote in relationships, not in love))) we tend to lose ourselves. But once you find yourself, you are able to love again. If not, the past will just bleed into your future. And that's not pretty.

Take me for example: I am just loving this. I wake up smiling, determined to end the entire day with that same smile, if not bigger. YES, I still cry at night. YES, I still talk about what happens. But guess what, I am human and that is what I do. Esp if I am trying to get over him. I will FOREVER love my ex . Who knows. We may get married. But as of now, I am waiting for a MAN OF SUBSTANCE to come sweep me off my feet. Not immaturity. I can only make so many excuses for such disrespectful behavior. At the end of the day, I am just too precious. And too damn pretty.

Yeah, I said I am precious. Don't you think of yourself as a precious gift from God? If not, Imma need you to go find a corner, sit down and think about your life. And don't get up until you realize that you are special in God's eyes. Things happen for a reason. Trust.

Shout out to my Sorors of the THEE Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, INNNNNNNC! Happy Founders Day! I love my sorority. She has beautiful herstory and it is amazing that I am part of it. Forever. Til the day I die. Honestly, I can't imagine how my life would be if I wasn't part of this Sorority. See, it was meant for me to be apart of this Sisterly Greatness. It's no lie, that Pretty Pink and Gorgeous Green Reign Supreme, starting from Jan. 15, 1908.

But back to the self-loving, don't let anyone check mate ya ass. You can win by re- strategizing the game and loving yourself.

... just saying.